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We love you Freddie - 'cos your're always there
I TRUST you all spent the international night of romance watching Arsenal’s thrilling win at Bolton in the FA Cup.
Natalie Imbruglia ignored my Valentine’s card again this year – it’s the tenth year in a row she hasn’t sent me anything back. Some would call it ungrateful.
Take it from me lads. It doesn’t matter how big a bunch of flowers you send, the good looking ones don’t want to come down the pub to watch the football on February 14. They expect to be treated to a Burger King at least.
So I asked the witty girl in the column next door to join me instead – yes, she is a Spurs fan but can tell a mean switcheroo gag.
But she seemed even less keen. Turns out she has had enough of football since Sheffield United made Tottenham and their flapping keeper Paul Robinson look silly on Saturday. A strange excuse, I thought. She seemed to love watching Sheffield United winning matches over Christmas.
So, no Nat. No Cath. Just me, a Chinese takeaway and a half pint in the pub. But when you beat Bolton away, after years of trying – after extra time – there is always a reason to be cheerful.
Altogether now: ‘We love you Freddie because you’re always there.’
I SEE Richard Osley’s campaign to rid England of Paul Robinson worked a treat last week. England won. Oh no, sorry, they lost. Better luck next time.
For one awful moment I thought the finger of blame had still been pointed at Robbo even though he was on the bench picking crumbs out of his navel as the goal flew in.
“Fat and lazy, that’s why England are bobbins‚” bellowed Sam Allardyce afterwards. Little bit rich coming from a man known in the game as Big, but it appears he was chipping at the nation. Phew.
Clever though eh? Shame BS, as he’s known in my house, isn’t in charge of all football. If he was he could answer all those tricky questions like why do dodgy decisions go Arsenal’s way? Why are the Gunners such bad sports?
And what was the score when Arsenal played at Bramall Lane in December?
(1-0 to Sheffield Utd in case you need the answer to that one immediately.)
Luckily Spurs have our own conundrum solver in Jermaine Genius. “There is something that needs to be looked at and changed,” he mused on Saturday.
“It’s not a fluke.” No, but last season will start looking like one if you lot don’t get your acts together pal.
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