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Sport - THE CROW with RICHARD OSLEY and CATHERINE ETOE
Published: 10 May 2007

We didn’t win but, then, neither did you

TEE-HEE. Altogether now: ‘You lost the league in north London. You lost the league at the Arsenal. You lost the league in north London.’
Chelsea, the £500 million Carling Cup winners, tried to be gallant losers in the face of

humiliation at Ashburton Grove on Sunday but not all of them could hide their sour grapes – what was your favourite moment?
The bit when Jose Mourinho told the roving Sky cameras to buzz off. The bit when John Terry collapsed in floods of tears – like Cristiano Ronaldo in a cup final. Or, my personal choice, the bit where grumpy assistant manager Steve Clarke flashed a ‘zero’ sign at the Arsenal fans. Boo-hoo.
What Clarke, who won next to nothing in his unspectacular playing career and was so helpful to Chelsea as a player that he was relegated with the club in the 1980s, was getting at was that the Gunners hadn’t won the league either. Big potatoes.
I’m sure that makes up for urinating all that money up a wall as you watched your team play the most boring long ball football while harping on about winning a quadruple that was clearly beyond them.

CONGRATULATIONS you Gooners. Your team finally played a part in the league title race.
It wasn’t easy. Beating a team with 10 men, even if one of them is Frank Lampard, can be impossible. And so it proved.
Still, at least you got to christen your swanky new stadium with a league championship. Shame it wasn’t yours, but I’m sure the club that put the Un

into your Invincible are grateful.
Not so sure Ashley Cole will be quite so chuffed when he comes out from hiding inside John Terry’s pacamac in the Ashburton General Library reading rooms.
Cheer up Ash, the League Cup is better than nothing. Just ask William Gallas. The best he can do is cast an envious glance at the Ladies’ trophy cabinet and dream of a call up from Vic Akers.
It’s the Chelski die hards (two years and counting) I feel sorry for though after Jose’s chin patting routine. I’d have thought he’d be better off telling his team they’d still be champions if they weren’t so fat rather than the fans, but what do I know?
I only support a team with the best front line in the business.

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Richard Osley is the Zero that Steve Clarke (European Cup Winners Cup Winner) was referring to. Mr Osley is obviously incapable of rational thought, let alone writing. He probably thinks that "Objectivity" is new bar that he's not been to yet.
Chris Stephens