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Have you ever seen an old Chelsea jersey?
SPURS fans just sit and take it. Every week I have a pop at them – and nobody writes in.
No fight, they are resigned to the fact that they will never be as good as Arsenal and are happy to settle for their Wafer Cup qualification each season.
But… have a swipe at Chelsea, dare to mention the fact they spent £750 million on buying  a team not good enough to win either the Premiership or the Champions League, and how they cry out loud.
Once again, a reader writes in this week with a crude imitation of my regular witty, hilarious, super funny column (see page 42). My column makes everybody laugh every week – nobody will think that the reader’s is funny.
The upset comes from the embarrassment of supporting a club for only two years – most attached themselves to Chelsea just as the chequebook opened. Unlike Arsenal, they have no history and no pride.
I didn’t see any Chelsea shirts in the streets in the 1980s or the 1990s, or even a few years back.
Now they have the cheek to walk down Camden High Street in their blue shirts like they live in Fulham.
If they lose the cup final on Saturday, the same folk will probably be wearing red come next week.
IT’S official: Arsenal are second rate. Whoops, I mean the season is over and Arsenal have won the race to be toppermost “second half” club in the league.
In Gooner speak, that means they heroically came back from a half time draw or loss to win more often than any other club in the land.
To everyone else, it means they were the biggest pile of pants in the  Premiership in the first period of their mind numbingly dull matches and the jammiest in the country in the second.
And we thought Gooners’ claims to fame this season were missing out on the championship by a mere 21 points and reaching the last 16 of the Champions League.
If I had my way we’d get out the open top-bus and award the freedom of Barnsbury to Robin van Persie (club’s highest scorer... last played in January).
But sadly, I have the same degree of influence over officialdom that Julio Baptista has over his right foot. So don’t hold your breath.
Which is something us Spurs fans have done all year while watching our devil with an angel’s face Dimitar Berbatov survive his ‘difficult’ first season.
Here’s to his second, may it be as high scoring and crowd pleasing as the first. And may it be with us.
 THE Gooners celebrate drawing against 10 men for 50 minutes after taking the lead. Ooh how things have changed. You were slaughtered! 10 games played and zero defeats. It must hurt. Get used to it.
Yes, only a Carling Cup to show for this season and an appearance at the new Wembley and a possible FA Cup. How sad it is to be a Chelski fan? I’m so depressed. Suicidal? Not after wondering how you Goners feel.
Sadly, being a Gooner, you have nothing to shout about, so you continue to try and irritate the pride of London fans in your biased column. You’ve succeeded with me.
Get used to it. You’re fourth rate now, at best. Clarkey got it right with the big fat zero.
As for stopping Chelski winning the title, you’re sadly mistaken. Check your points tally against United this season against your points tally versus Chelski.
What are the odds for the Premiership Title in 2007-2008? Chelski evens and the Gooners 100-1, 200-1? Ha.
Finally, a magnificent stadium it must be said, sadly Trophy less and it’ll remain that way for a very long time. Enjoy the Summer.
I’ll be back to you in August, when the quadrouple starts all over again for the Mighty Blue Army.
At least you have the Ladies to cheer on!
PS: Ms C Etoe and Spurs... irrelevant!
PETER MILES
via email
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Your Comments:
Richard Osley is the Zero that Steve Clarke (European Cup Winners Cup Winner) was referring to. Mr Osley is obviously incapable of rational thought, let alone writing. He probably thinks that "Objectivity" is new bar that he's not been to yet.
Chris Stephens |
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